Zankoku da ne (jealous of chinen? wtf)

hai, i don't care if-- people in facebook read this. they'll just say, "gosh, she's still at it na!?"
okay, back to the new blogspot. hai, i'm in the worst shape now,
i could tell you from the beggining but it'll just be, a, waste.

so, college is starting and i can barely open facebooks, or continue my fanfictions (it isn't that good tho, the fanfiction) and i'm so tired, now i'm in a fever state and i have a heavy headache, but i have to go to campus on o6.oo tho- and i began to think, that i'm not that good, why am i so confident to take this subject? i think, my skill is only vary on manga, or on imagination side-
but i got so confident back then because i got the grade 1 thingy, but no- i'm not good at all
my father said, what is said will happen. but i'm not swearing on myself, i'm saying the truth
ne, kami-sama? i think, i'm just stuck on my dreams, i have so many of them but i let go-
that's the hardest part.. (yeay MCR)

well i can't give up now, can i?
yeah- so i don't know just do it, i don't know

i'm so jealous at chinen (chinen yuri) yeah why is he, so, cute.
he's so cute, still in high school, have yama-chan, have many good friends
and he looks happy na. i'm so jealous, so jealous. why aren't i japanese?
*i know it starting to be a whining sht

oh! today SHINee is coming to indonesia! yey! hey! what am i excited for? i am not a fan
no really, i'm not a fan. but i'm excited! because i'm happy for their fans. they must be so happy, have fun ne, shawol. idk when Hey! Say! JUMP going to come here, maybe won't be happening. yup. but i'm interested in taemin tho--- because some tweets i read-
oh well, okay-
i have to go now
it's 5;46 AM
well ja ne..
i want to vomit T_T it hurts, my body..